Have you ever been hard at work on your chosen path in life, or maybe training for a career in athletics or the arts, maybe just got a promotion at your job and you are moving along doing well, learning, accomplishing and enjoying what you are doing and then all of a sudden you find yourself steeped in self-doubt? Why am I here? Can I really do this? This can’t be real! What if I fail or look ridiculous in front of people?

So, you try harder to fill the shoes you were already filling. You try to please the people you were already pleasing. You obsess over being perfect, doing more, getting up earlier and losing much needed healing sleep. Because surely you are not really good enough and surely you are not really the person everyone thinks you are! How could I ever have deserved all this praise and reward? Any of this sound familiar? Welcome to the world of Imposter Syndrome!

Here’s the thing, there seems to be a two-edged sword to this situation. The less you feel worthy, accomplished and deserving, the more obsessed you become. So, you work harder and harder and it can be a benefit to you in some ways as you improve your skills, work ethic, etc. However, you may also find yourself frustrated, enjoying what you do less, and at some point maybe even succumbing to a bit of self-sabotage. Because after all, a small nagging voice in the back of your head tells you don’t really deserve all this reward, do you?

Not feeling “good enough” creating forced stressed out achievement will only take you so far. If you don’t enjoy what you are doing fully, what’s the point? So, what do you do next? How do you feel better about yourself without losing that edge you have come to rely on? You know, the perfectionism, the drive to succeed, the early morning or late night “work ethic” that can be a sort of veiled internal panic. How do you not lose the obsession that keeps you in the game? Surely your successes are from all this and not the fact that you are actually worthy, deserving, and good at what you do?

It is really a vicious cycle isn’t it? What is the one thing missing? Well, first of all you can’t fix what you can’t see. And secondly, wouldn’t it feel better to achieve from a place of relentless confidence while you enjoy every moment without the stress of disbelief without losing your drive?

My first step in this journey would be to uncover the hidden motivations, needs and goals. Uncover, heal and recreate your own path to your dreams, achievements and goals.

When YOU are the one in control rather than the doubts and the obsession, you will also be able to work from a healthier physical and mental state. That is the path to longevity without fallout. This is the way to close the door on feeling like you don’t belong in your own life!

I use journaling, meditation and visualization. What have you tried and how well has it worked for you? I would love to hear from you in the comments or an email!